and my brother was 5 years younger than ‘kid’ and we were in crowded mall around christmastime

packed obviously

so i came up with the ingenious (crafty?)

idea of getting my brother to pretend he was blind

imagine this;

a little boy walking eyes lightly closed

with his big sister.. one arm around his shoulder and the other holding his hand

guiding him through the crowds of people

:’) touching? you’d let them by right?

haha

yeah my parents just brought it up

and i was in dire need of distraction from calculating gross reserves.

also, i wanted to test this out? >>

nd i came across something that made me think; oh man, i was SUCH a sophisticated sixth grader.

this was back when teachers forced you to churn out poems, haikus… rhymes.. sonnets? and these really easy ones… i forget what they were called.. but obviously they didn’t require much thought =__=

anyway, our city had this annual publication of poems called urban voices and our teacher, ms morrison (who we all thought had a thing with the science teacher, but apparently he was already married? idk, does a male teacher and a female teacher hanging out all the time a sign…?)

anyway, she was really keen on having us all submit something so we’d get published. (this is where my delusions of wanting to be a published something started, after this i went on to write for the city newspaper.. like smh in australia, gosh, things are so easy when you’re a kid)

so yeah, i went to her desk with a stack of crappy poems and this was like.. the second one she went through and she was all ecstatic and said happily “this is it! submit this one!”

i was unhappy. she hadn’t even gotten to my emo ones that were all like omgomgomg my life is so messed up totally dunno what i wanna be.. and stuff. little did i know, after being … like doused in attention at the ceremony after being the only one chosen at my school… that i’d return to her next year desperate to feel special again… and with a poem that basically reeked of …gossebumpy awkwardness.

i swear. if i was a grown english teacher and i read the following ‘poem’ i’d lolmypants off. =___= dramatic seventh graders, thinking they’re old enough to understand the world and then conquer it.. and more.

im so embarassed.. but for the sake of being complete, this post needs this;

goddd *smashes own brain in with a rock*

i can’t believe i pretty much just put in three jobs in my poem, engineers was probably only there for the G as well. =__= i was probably itching to put in doctor.

anyway, notice i stuck with the very retard-friendly poem type. yeah. i clearly had no talent in poetry. but omg, i obvs sounded desperate enough to get chosen again.

fml. even as i flip through the books now, everyone else was AND IS so much wittier and cleverer than i was.. and i am today…. aissh.

i don’t think anything has changed T__T to this very day. still wish people would flip to my articles the second they get their hands on a publication with my writing in it. gooooosh. it’s like one of those dreams people have but don’t have the abilities to see through.. hm

sadder thing is, i probably would have continued submitting poor-excuses-for-poems until the end of my school career, except i changed school boards.. so yeah. so sad to know i knew no shame =___=

speaking of which.. im handing out the last issue of actualite tomoz. : (

X) they have these cute signs they’ve written themselves (on paperbags!) which make me : ) to myself while i wait for them to put my yummy buttery meaty lunch togetherrr

giraffes have really high blood pressure

pentagram

katy perry isn’t her real name

and here’s a pic of me and my bro, who is making hilarious moony eyes, wearing the same hoodie.

i failed to convince him to change out of it : (, so we walked out of the house wearing the same thing.

this is why i need to get another hoodie..

but i just wanna say this?

after doing mpn, i kinda realised that doing things that MEAN something, are BEYOND the walls of my room and maybe even beneficial to my future

might actually be something i enjoy doing.

i like getting to know people who are full of energy nd being part of something that does big things.

at this point, im kinda bummed out that i wasted my first year and didn’t get more involved with student groups (not stuff like anime, but career driven ones where you occasionally get to, as barney says, SUIT UP!)

yeah.. strange i know, i would never believe anyone, not even my mom if she told me i’d be feeling this way one day.. but yeah.. i really wanna get more involved in this kind of stuff, not just coz it looks good on my resume but because it also makes my life less dull and more … substantial? useful? meaningful? that stuff.

im just saying this right now, no idea if it’ll ever take form.. if i’ll ever be able to get myself as far out there as i imagine myself at this moment.. but im sure going to try X)

gawd. late night inspiration sucks, you can’t really DO anything about it =___= except blog.